'This Means War' movie quotes include the most clever, best lines from the 2012 film that pits two CIA agents against each other as they try to win the affections of a beautiful woman. Agents FDR Foster (Chris Pine) and Tuck (Tom Hardy) are actually good friends, until they both fall for Lauren (Reese Witherspoon). Their efforts to attract her wind up nearly destroying them. See a favorite 'This Means War' quote on this list? By all means, vote it up. And if you know of a great 'This Means War' movie quote that isn't on the list, add it!
'This Means War' is directed by McG ('Terminator Salvation,' 'Charlie's Angels') and also stars Chelsea Handler, Til Schweiger, Abigail Spencer and Angela Bassett. When Lauren finds that she likes both Tuck and Foster, it's up to the two agents to help her make her choice. They pull out all the stops, too, using all of their CIA high-tech gadgets to their advantage. It's spy vs. spy: Who will Lauren choose? And can Tuck and Foster manage to keep their professional lives separate from their personal lives?
Great movies feature excellent quotes: lines that stick with you long after you've left the theater. For more of the best quotes and dialogue from hit movies, check out these lists for the great quotes from 'Journey 2: The Mysterious Island' 'The Woman in Black,' 'Big Miracle,' 'Hugo,' 'The Muppets,' 'The Rum Diary,' 'Moneyball,' 'The Descendants,' 'War Horse,' 'Arthur Christmas,' 'Happy Feet 2,' 'Tower Heist,' 'Puss in Boots,' 'The Smurfs' movie, 'Cars 2' and 'Jack and Jill.'
This Means War Movie Quotes,
Not Backing Off
Tuck: "So you're not backing off?"
FDR: "Nope."
FDR has no intention of backing off. That would be exactly what Tuck wants. It's all up to Lauren to choose the man she truly loves. FDR's still in the game, and will stay in the game until a decision is made.
They'll Probably Just Shake Hands
Lauren (to herself in the mirror as Tuck and FDR beat each other up in the restaurant): "Okay you can do this. You are confident woman who can deal with conflict. I'm going to pass out. Just get out there, tell them your decision. They're rational. They may even become friends. They'll probably just shake hands...."
Yes, Lauren, they'll shake hands. Sure they will. These guys have worked together for years on some really dangerous CIA cases, but this is the one "case" that could tear them apart.
Finger Painting with Gustav Klimt
FDR (to Lauren): "He was a strong advocate of the finger painting movement."
Agent (after losing his audio hookup to FDR): "We lost contact."
Tuck (taking over the audio feed to FDR): "Sometimes he would finger his paintings to get closer to them."
FDR (to Lauren): "The intimacy with the canvas, to finger a painting...to..."
Tuck: "Sometimes he would use mud and sticks..."
FDR (to Lauren): "You know, he used mud and sticks..."
Tuck: "And if he couldn't find a stick..."
FDR (to Lauren): "And if he couldn't find a stick...just use..."
Lauren: "What?!"
FDR (to Lauren): "You know, enough talking. Let's let the paintings speak for themselves."
When FDR learns that Lauren is a fan of famed Austrian painter Gustav Klimt, he decides to wow her with his knowledge of fine art. He hooks up an audio feed with another agent, who feeds him lines about what to say about each Klimt painting. Things are going really well, until Tuck takes over the audio -- and FDR suddenly begins explaining to Lauren that Klimt liked finger painting.
Going to Hell
Lauren: "Oh, I think I'm going to hell..."
Trish: "Don't worry. If you're going to hell, I'll just come pick you up."
More concerns from Lauren about whether she should be dating two men at once. She's having trouble deciding who she likes more, and both are putting up a big fight to win her affections. She might be getting a fast pass to hell, but she's going out having an awfully good time.
He's a Little Safe
Lauren (to Trish): "Tuck is great, he's sweet, he's kind, we have so much fun. But he's maybe too sweet -- a little earnest? Sort of safe."
Lauren is talking to Trish pretty openly about how she feels about FDR and Tuck, specifically, their flaws. After explaining that FDR has "tiny T Rex hands," she tells Trish that Tuck seems pretty safe. Unbeknownst to her, Tuck and FDR are listening in - and Tuck decides to take action and prove to Lauren that he's a bad a**. With paintball. And things don't go so well for him...
Killing
Lauren: "Have you ever killed anybody with your bare hands?"
Tuck: "Not this week."
Tuck is trying pretty hard to impress Lauren. She thinks he's a little tame, so he turns on the whole "I'm a CIA agent" swagger to change her mind.
Make It Rain
Lauren (to Tuck): "This has been the perfect night."
FDR: "Make it rain."
Lauren's big date with Tuck is going quite well. When they get back to her apartment, things get a little hot and heavy. FDR's monitoring the situation, and decides it's time to derail Tuck's evening. Quickly.
A Gentleman's Agreement
Tuck: "Let's just let her decide."
FDR: "Sure."
Tuck: "And while we're at it, why don't we put some ground rules in as well."
FDR: "I think we should."
Tuck: "Number one: I don't think we should tell her that we know each other."
FDR: "Number two: Let's stay out of each others way."
Tuck: "Number three: No hanky panky."
FDR: "God, you have not dated in a long time, have you?"
Tuck: "And if this ever starts to affect our friendship...
FDR: "Which it won't..."
Tuck: "Then we walk away."
FDR: "Done."
Tuck: "So then we have, we have..."
FDR: "We have a gentleman's agreement. May the best man win."
Tuck (Tom Hardy) and FDR (Chris Pine) are best friends and CIA agents. When they realize they're dating the same girl, Lauren Scott (Reese Witherspoon), they decide to play things out and let Lauren be the one to make the choice between them. First, they set a few ground rules. What are the chances those rules actually get followed?
Get Flexible
Trish (to Lauren): "Get out there, you get flexible!"
When Lauren shows signs of wavering, debating whether she should be seeing both FDR and Tuck, Trish steps in with a little pep talk. Dear Reese Witherspoon: You are dating Tom Hardy AND Chris Pine! Listen to Trish and get seriously flexible now!
Gloria Steinem
Trish (to Lauren): "You think Gloria Steinem got arrested and sat in a jail cell so you could act like a little bitch?"
Lauren's feeling a bit strange about dating two guys at once. Her friend Trish (Chelsea Handler) seems to have no problem with the idea, reminding her that she needs to suck it up and enjoy her freedom as a single woman.